Life in the Pink

Wednesday, July 31, 2002

This Explains Me Taking Personality Tests At One In The Morning
My bumper sticker reads:

Lighten up.
Take the quiz.
3:46 AM Comments

Whore
Vote for me, y'all.
2:30 AM Comments

Rock!
It's true.
I'm the number one site in Yahoo searches for codiene tequila.
I couldn't be more proud.
2:25 AM Comments

Tuesday, July 30, 2002

Wouldn't Life Be Better If . . .
Realty companies actually sold reality.
And by "better," I mean "more like it is when you're on heavy psychadelics."
7:47 PM Comments

Oops
Yesterday, I was looking for some insurance information. I logically opened the manilla folder labeled "Top Drawer, Medical Records, etc."
It contained a poster of Richard Stallman and a bunch of naked photos.
I love my filing system.
4:52 PM Comments

I Am The Coolest
So, if you scroll down to the bottom of this page, you will note that Life in the Pink now has over 10,000 hits.
It's about time, motherfuckers.
4:23 PM Comments

Monday, July 29, 2002

DOOMED!
So, in an attempt to be a good little job seeker, I called this college to ask about a resume I sent in about what's basically a help desk position.
Then lady I talked to on the phone told me that they had gotten three hundred resumes. For a college help desk position.
It's becoming clear that I will never be employed.
8:06 PM Comments

And Fluffy Bunnies, Too!
I love the quote at the end of This LA Times Article about XXX.
"Even punk rockers love puppy dogs."
It's true!
1:11 PM Comments

Saturday, July 27, 2002

Note To Self
Banging mouse on things will not make it work better.
7:36 PM Comments

Hell Yeah, Motherfucker
I am 28% Geek

You probably work in computers, or a history deptartment at a college. You never really fit in with the "normal" crowd. But you have friends, and this is a good thing.

Take the Geek Test at fuali.com
7:21 PM Comments

Friday, July 26, 2002

Insight
This cartoon speaks directly to my soul.
4:29 PM Comments

Creation

I just finished this hat today. I crocheted it myself, with no pattern or anything. Because I am super cool. Or a big dork, depending on how you look at it.
Also, eventually all my clothes will have ears or horns.
It's kind of on crooked in the picture, but that's just because I didn't have a mirror. In real life it's quite symmetrical.
1:54 AM Comments

Thursday, July 25, 2002

Shoes I Have Bought In the Last Month

I am a shoe whore!!!!!
4:09 PM Comments

W00t W00t!

I got a digital camera as a graduation present! I got a digital camera as a graduation present!
This is a photo of me my dad took with it. In it, you can see 1) I am quite shiny, 2) my quite nice eye make up, 3) my new haircut and 4) that my hair needs redying rather desperately.
3:28 PM Comments

Wednesday, July 24, 2002

The Prodigal Blogger Returns
A new old blogger that you should check out.
Although, really, I think she speaks good Canadian.
7:38 PM Comments

Back Home
Well, I'm back home, at least until September 1st or so. My parents remodeled my room while I was gone, just in case my moving to a strange city with no job handn't given me a large enough sense of upheaval. There's nothing like coming home to find all your possesions piled up on top of your bed.
I spent my last day in Philly looking at dead babies with my friend Reed. This was actually legal, as we went to the Mutter Museum, a museum of medical oddities. I wasn't so into the looking at pickled deformed dead people thing, but they had old medical equipement there, and I love old medical equipement. The museum had one exhibit on diseases that seemed pretty educational, but the rest of it was obviously catering to the Punk Ass Kid market. In fact, I think if a girl hung out by the dead baby skeletons long enough, she could probably chat up a cute punk or two. Reed and I had a conversation with some kids about where the dentures were in the collection of things that had been found in people's air and nasal passages.
The most exciting thing was that they had chunks of historical personages! I saw a chunk out of Grover Cleveland's chin, and one of John Wilkes Booth's vertabrae, and the attached livers of Chang and Eng, the first famous siamese twins.
Also, baby skeletons are really scary! Their skulls look quite evil, like mean alien things that want to eat your brains. You'd think they'd be cute, since babies are cute and all, but apparently it doesn't translate to bone structure.
4:06 AM Comments

Monday, July 15, 2002

Apartments Have Been Found!
Specifically one apartment, a very nice apartment in a lovely lovely neighborhood in a lovely apartment building near nice urban things and bars and people and shops. Also, it has a porch. It is slightly expensive, but otherwise lovely.
If my crackhead parents will only stop being crazy and cosign for it because I have no credit, I will be in like flynn and the hell out of dodge.
Now, I only have to get a job. It will be easy. Very easy. There are jobs everywhere! They are waiting for me! Being joblike and well paying!
Um, yes. Three hours of sleep.
8:08 PM Comments

Post-Apocalyptic Cover Girl
I'm in the lobby of my hotel, where the fire alarm has been going off for the last forty minutes. And yes, it is 7:10 in the morning. Actually, the fire alarm first went off at 4:30 in the morning (at which point I had gotten all of three hours of sleep), but then they managed to turn it off after half an hour. Then it went off again at 6:28, and they don't appear to be so lucky this time. I'm trying to use Eliot Smith to drown out the constant beeping, but it's only working moderately well. Also, the elevators are off and my room is on the 9th floor.
On the plus side, the constant flashing lights give the place a nice "End of the World" feel.
Of course, this happens the night I decide to wear my Dyke Pride shirt to bed.
7:14 AM Comments

Sunday, July 14, 2002

Synergy
Last night, I was both puking and menstrating, and both fluids were the same color.
5:06 PM Comments

Friday, July 12, 2002

I Am Sunburnt
Today I have walked a million miles and called a million people and written down a thousand phone numbers and seen two apartments.
But I will find an apartment. I am confident.
10:45 PM Comments

Thursday, July 11, 2002

Later, Gators
I'll be in Philly for the next week, looking for an apartment and a job (wish me luck).
In the meantime, here are my friends to entertain you.
3:27 AM Comments

Ahhh, Schoolgirl Goodness
I was at Super K tonight (I got a little plaid skirt, cause I need another one to support my punk rock lifestyle.), and I was checking out the school uniforms cause they had these sexy little blue skirts. Unfortunately, the little size chart only went up to 110 pounds, and I am larger than that.
However, I had a realization! All I need to do is get my ass to a uniform store, and I will be able to purchase all the schoolgirl skirts I want! Then I can cut off excess skirt and wear them to parties. I am a genius.
3:26 AM Comments

Tuesday, July 09, 2002

Ahhh, Geekboys, You Will Never Learn
From a Salon article about how online role-playing games are trying to market themselves to non-geeks (Um, hello? They're ONLINE ROLE-PLAYING GAMES. If you play them, you are a geek. That is the way it works.):
"Of the 700 or so learnable skills available, only a third are combat-related, with a number designed to appeal to women -- or at any rate to those less interested in a life of galactic swashbuckling. "I'm kind of embarrassed to mention this," says Blackman, "but we have a hairdressing skill tree.""
Yes. The women, they love the hairdressing. In fact, if you add applying make-up and shopping to the mix, maybe I'll start playing!
Sometimes, I wonder if these men have ever actually met a woman.
2:35 AM Comments

Monday, July 08, 2002

Look! It's Lego Me!

courtesy of The Mini-mizer
6:55 PM Comments

So Right
So the middle-aged rocking featured songs introduced by powerpoint slide shows, liberal use of the word "squeezebox" and funny hats. It was fucking rad.
1:39 AM Comments

Sunday, July 07, 2002

It's the Small Things
Tonight, I'm going to go see a band that features two of my uncle's and someone playing accordian. I am so excited! It's going to be middle-aged rocking extra-ordinaire. I wonder if they have MP3s.
5:16 PM Comments

Saturday, July 06, 2002

Confidential to Chris in Oberlin
Email me! It's important.
8:52 PM Comments

Now With 20% Less Suck
Note the new, on-site, should make site load faster, in my own goddamn cgi-bin comments.
Awww yeah, baby. Who's your daddy now?
6:42 PM Comments

Friday, July 05, 2002

Pretty! Sparkly!
Well, as much as I dislike the new patriotism, I have to saw I totally enjoyed the assload of fireworks I saw last night.
Can we have fireworks every night? Please? They're pretty!
6:06 PM Comments

The Perfect Job
I know! I'll be a mortician for the Navy!
3:26 PM Comments

Thursday, July 04, 2002

The Job Search Continues
I think I may have sent my resume to every IT recruiting firm on the East Coast, if not in the world. I know that I've copied it into every possible format. (It's now available in HTML, Word doc, or ASCII!)
I wonder if it would help if I added "And I will suck your dick" into my cover letter after the part where I say that I work well in a team environment.
5:32 PM Comments

Wednesday, July 03, 2002

Our Fight
So, the girl and I have become a disgustingly cute two-headed lesbian beastie lately. We were talking about how gross we probably are for those around us, and we came to the conclusion that we should fight in public more in order to make other people feel better. Then we came up with a fight to have. Here it is.
Me: Hey, are those my socks you're wearing?
Girl: You gave them to me.
Me: No, I lent them to you.
Girl: Well, you never give me anything.
Me: I give you things, baby.
Girl: Herpes doesn't count, okay?
Me: Oh no you di'nt! You gave me herpes.
Girl: Well, you gave me the flu.
Me: See, I give you things! Anyway, you never give me anything.
Girl: What about your breast implants?
Me: You said you would dump me if I didn't get them!
Girl: I still gave them to you.
Me: Whatever.
As you can see, it is a great fight, and I'm sure it makes us much, much less cute when we have it.
10:47 PM Comments

Tuesday, July 02, 2002

Cyn Is
Cyn is MP3 for me
Cyn is under construction
Cyn is another friendship of mine
CYN is passionate about microalgae
Cyn is a 26 year-old Aries
Cyn is a provider of environmental contracting services
Cyn is offered a solution
(CYN) is toxic
Definitions courtesy of Google.
3:19 PM Comments

Best Line Overheard At Pride
Said in a crowd by a very, very gay sounding man:
"I feel like a salmon, I just want to spawn."
2:17 PM Comments

Gayty Gayty Gay Gay Gay
In the last two weeks, I've been to a gay club in Hollywood, a Dyke March in West Hollywood, two Pride street fair things at Civic Center in San Francisco, and Pink Saturday on the Castro in San Francisco.
I am all gayed out, y'all.
Although, the cool thing about the street fairs is that you get free shit for being gay. I think that should happen all the time.
2:16 PM Comments

Back

I'm back.
I've been made one of bluway.com's Top Ten Most Interesting Sites in my absense, proving that I win things when I don't post. Let's not contemplate that too deeply, shall we?
I'm happy to say that I am fine, and my absense is purely due to an internet-free Northern California roadtrip taken by the girl and I. But now I am back, she is gone, I am sad, and there will be an update-a-rama.
2:08 PM Comments