Emily. Shock and Awe.

Phil. Just Like In the Movies.

Wendy. Ski Bum and Adventuress.

Rachel. Dancing Queen.

Julie. The Littlest Elf.

Chris. There Ain't No Party Like a Marching Band Party.

Cyn. Just a Pink Haired Girl.

 

So my parents' friends Faith & Jim have this high school-aged son named George, & after Faith tells my mom about his goings-on, I get to hear all the gossip. He seems to have a lot of girl trouble, of which the latest installment is that he has begun accompanying his new girlfriend to some fundamentalist church that she belongs to. There was lots of discussion of the possible bad consequences that could result from his fundamentalist brainwashing. My mom: "I mean, they're sitting there, they've gotta be talking about God & Jesus all the time! How could a Unitarian fail to notice that?" My parents are good for something after all!

posted by Emily Comments [] 10:20 PM

Monday, February 24, 2003

 

i feel your pain em. i've had laringitis that turned into bronchitis then the stomache flu and now is just bronchitis again. the bronchitis is ok though; it is a constant companion. i laugh, i cough, i run, i cough, sometimes i have sex, and i cough.

posted by Wendolyn Comments [] 6:54 PM

 

See what drug you are.


See what drug you are.

I tied.

posted by Cyn Comments [] 4:29 PM

Saturday, February 22, 2003

 

For Em (and others)

The girl who cut my hair told me about these atheist links:

The Secular Web and American Atheists. She was wearing this super cool pendant with the American Atheists logo, too.

posted by Cyn Comments [] 10:13 PM

 

Since I last posted I have been busy being damn sick. On Thursday night I was all headachey & shivering & filled with malaise. Around 9:00, since I was too sick to read, too sick to clean my room, & I had already taken a nap, I decided to watch TV. In my state of feverish delerium I settled on "Are You Hot or Not? The Search for America's Sexiest People." Almost immediately after I turned on the TV, I was confronted with the following disturbing things:

-- A shampoo commercial featuring a black woman promoting Eurocentric standards of beauty by proudly demonstrating her ability to flip her hair around.
-- Van Morrison's "Moondance" being used to sell cars.

So I was like "oh wait, this is why I don't normally watch TV." & that's before the show even started! Basically, the format was that the people who had passed the hot-people auditions they had held in various regions of the country would be paraded around in front of you, & then they would come out 1 at a time in swimsuits & a three-person panel (model, fashion designer, some other dude) would assign them numerical scores for face, body, & overall sex appeal. Then they would kick some of them off based on the scores. The nuttiest part, though, was that before each commercial break they would show little clips of interviews they had conducted with the winning & losing contestants. "I was laying in bed for 3 days wondering if I was gonna walk again. Never in my mind did I imagine I wouldn't be hot anymore. I knew even if I ended up in a wheelchair, I would still be hot," one woman (not in a wheelchair) confidently asserted. The reactions of the losers ranged from the earnest "I was robbed" & "I have lost my dream" to a sassy "they can't influence me, I KNOW I'm hot." Of course they voted off all the wrong people -- it was very disillusioning.

posted by Emily Comments [] 12:48 PM

Friday, February 21, 2003

 

posted by Cyn Comments [] 1:43 AM

Wednesday, February 19, 2003

 

Cynthia is right: It's pandemonium down here. So I had to take a plane that left at 9 p.m. (earlier flights were full). It landed late, & this is what I had to do:

-- Get my bag
-- Find the shuttle to the parking lot
-- Find my car in the parking lot; I had a little card saying what number my parking space was, but massive drifts of snow were obscuring all the numbers. I wandered around & around & then a guy in a truck helped me find it.
-- Get a guy in a backhoe (they had guys driving around in backhoes) to come dig the car out so it was able to be gotten at

So after that I could get in the car, but it was still too stuck to back out. I surmised that perhaps this was because the front of it was buried in snow a foot over the level of the hood. The only thing to do, it seemed to me at the time, was to climb onto the hood & sort of wade in & try to kick most of the snow off, so that it what I did. For a short period of time, the whole deal was so crappy that it stopped being crappy & turned into an adventure. Huge chunks of snow were sliding everywhere, & it was exhilerating. That didn't work entirely either, though, so I had to borrow a shovel from some guy to dig my wheels out. I finally got home at 2 a.m., ate dinner, & went to bed. It also seems that being cold & wet for all that time has given me a cold. It's a good thing next weekend is soon.

posted by Emily Comments [] 1:31 PM

Tuesday, February 18, 2003

 

Although, as you can see, it is Tuesday, I am still here in Oberlin -- the reason for this is the snow, which shut down the airports in MD & caused my flight to get cancelled, so I am stuck here living off the kindness of friends until this evening. It has been great. I saw Grace, & I saw Ben, & I saw Chris, & I saw Andy, & I saw Bettina & was able to introduce her to several people who have been hearing about her for years but didn't know who she was. Oh, & I saw "Tartuffe"! Certain high-haired people apparently didn't like it, but we thought it was deck. I tried to get Chris to go sledding with me, but we couldn't think of a good enough makeshift sled, & I was like "oh, screw it." The sad part of all this is that, unlike some people, I had to miss Ladytron, which was on Monday night. Also, when I finally get back home my car will be buried under 3 feet of snow at the airport. I am supposed to be meeting Larissa at the radio station now so I have to go.

posted by Emily Comments [] 4:46 PM

Monday, February 17, 2003

 

I just got a courtesy call from a blood bank. The coversation went as follows:
woman from blood bank: We are critically low on blood. Have you ever given blood before?
me: Yeah, but you don't want it. I've had sex with a man who's had sex with a man since 1973.
woman: Oh, ok, then. Thank you for your time.

I think it would have been better if she had said, "Oh, you're right, we don't want your homo-blood!" and hung up. In any case, I'd like to thank the parties, known and unknown, who made this conversation possible.

posted by Julie Comments [] 5:32 PM

Sunday, February 16, 2003

 

it is now day 2 of the super walking hangover weekend. we had to work quite late on valentine's, but we decided to party after work anyway. many saki bombs, a six pack, and a bottle of champagne later, i awoke from my stupor and lo and behold, it was time to go back to work. there were 2 questions on my mind: how did i get wasabi on my butt, and why is there a half empty bottle of whipped cream under the bed. then later in the afternoon i was like, aha! i remember... whippets! work was not fun because no one seemed to sympathisize with my need to nap under the desk. however, we did learn that spearhead was playing at the hyatt saturday night and managed to get tickets. at 3, my boss left and i decided it was time to get more alcohol. i made a big bottle of jungle juice. it proved to be a very faithful and true companion during the concert. the concert was great and we danced on the stage at the end. i also realized that what my car needed was a full bar in the trunk. i carry snowchains, gloves, etc for weather emergencies, but what about alcohol emergencies?? it would have the added benefit of remaining refridgerated during the winter. eventually i made my way home through this big snowstorm we're having and passed out on the sofa and once again it was time to go to work. so i'm driving to work this morning, and i stop at the end of the street, sip my coffee, and suddenly a big suv comes skidding down the road and hits me. this was not a major concern except that the coffee spilled and was therefore gone. i get out and there is no damage to my car, but when i try to get his license, suv man starts ranting about how the road is treacherous and he must report this to the police before we proceeed. much coffee-less time passes in this manner. eventually, i say, 'of course it's slippery, it's snowing and the road is a curvy hill, YOU ASS, that's why there's a 10-mph speed limit, so shut up and give me your insurance info.' he continues to rant as i take down his #, so finally i say in my most threatening pre-coffee tone "SAVE IT FOR THE JUDGE BUDDY!" i've always wanted to say that... tee hee.

posted by Wendolyn Comments [] 12:51 PM

Saturday, February 15, 2003

 

For me, the themes for this year's Valentine's Day were dirty snow and broken glass, but it's not as bad as it sounds.

posted by Julie Comments [] 5:55 PM

 

This is Volume I of my extended weekend in Oberlin. First of all I had to get to the airport, which was fine until I got to the bit with all the parking lots, & then it became clear that the theme for BWI is confusing signage. They have done a very thorough job with that theme. After that there was a lot of running around & being herded, & I was like "oh wait, now I remember, air travel is a pain in the ass." The flight was very crowded. I sat in between 2 people & read about 6 pages of Midnight's Children, then fell asleep. At the end of the flight the people on both sides of me took a sort of polite interest in the book & started asking all about whether it was good & so forth, & I was like, "uh, I guess, so far." Then they started asking about The Satanic Verses, & the result of it was that I ended up trying to explain to this woman what the phrase "The Satanic Verses" refers to in Islamic theology. I had just woken up & I do not think I really succeeded. I was like "so when that guy? Wrote that thing? The Koran! Anyway, he...."
So: I had dinner in Asia House, I had fun times with Julie & Rachel, & I hung out with Lynn, who was sick but claimed he was going to try to be stoic about it. Last night I went to a party which featured beets. I had brought a bottle of Old Dan Tucker's Old Kentucky Bourbon b/c at one time it had seemed like a good idea to buy some sleazy liqour & then carry it around with me everywhere offering it to people. (As someone pointed out to me, this may not really be a good idea, b/c people might think they want a swig, then realize that your ghetto-ass bourbon tastes disgusting & spit it back in the bottle. This didn't happen though.) Larissa was there & we tried to organize a game of spin-the-bottle through the brilliant tactice of going around telling everyone that we had "heard" some people were going to play it "in like 15 minutes." Strangely, enthusiasm for spin-the-bottle was low. Things started to thin out & so we went back to Larissa's place & ran around Spanish House acting juvenile. I slept on the floor at John & Lynn's. Most of the Kentucky Bourbon is gone now. More updates soon!
In closing, I would like to send out mad props to the mysterious Oberlin people who read the Naked House blog. You guys are awesome!

posted by Emily Comments [] 3:42 PM

Friday, February 14, 2003

 

i don't know why i find this hillarious... i just do

posted by Wendolyn Comments [] 10:24 PM

Thursday, February 13, 2003

 

Did I mention that I made a quiz?

Oh, yeah, I did, and none of you bastards cared. Well, I don't care what kind of stain you are, either!

posted by Cyn Comments [] 3:13 AM

Wednesday, February 12, 2003

 

Just in time for Valentine's Day, The Onion gives you Valentine Cards. I personally like "Twirling my meat for you."

posted by Christopher Comments [] 3:39 PM

Tuesday, February 11, 2003

 

What Lizvang Personality Are You?

posted by Cyn Comments [] 7:47 PM

 

Hey, look at that:


I'm a Hitachi Magic Wand! No nonsense, no frills -
I get the job done, son.

This quiz brought to you by href="http://www.uffish.com">Uffish
Thoughts and href="http://www.blogwhore.com/game">Blogwhore
2


What kind of sex toy are you?
brought to you by Quizilla

posted by Julie Comments [] 7:27 PM

 

I'm a rabbit vibe! Stylish, voracious, and I know
exactly what I want and how to get it. Rrowr!

This quiz brought to you by Uffish Thoughts and Blogwhore
2


What kind of sex toy are you?
brought to you by Quizilla

posted by Cyn Comments [] 6:59 PM

 

You're a wine stain. Equally likely to occur after
a romantic night out on the town, and a night
on your sofa, contemplating the pathetic wreck
your life has become. Either way, you're just
a reflection of what it looks like inside your
liver.


What Stain Are You?
brought to you by Quizilla

Note: I made this quiz.

posted by Cyn Comments [] 6:58 PM

 

I don't really have a lot to say so I'm posting some links: pirate jokes; more McSweeney's; this is cool.

posted by Emily Comments [] 1:43 PM

Monday, February 10, 2003

 

I got this from a friend of mine, and after the whole metalhead debacle, you guys are good at this kind of thing:

February 9, 2003

For the last several months students at Boyd County High School in rural eastern Kentucky have been struggling to start a gay-straight alliance at their school. The following New York Times article gives a good summary of what's happened so far in their case:

http://www.glsen.org/templates/news/record.html?section=12&record=1531

The local opposition to the GSA has been pretty nasty, but of course it's other students who have been the most cruel.

Two anonymous online journals were put up by boys from Boyd County High School to make fun of the GSA members. The humor used on these sites is puerile, childish, and so stupid it hardly makes any sense at all - you'll see when you look at them - but they shouldn't be dismissed just because the sites are so stupid. This is very hurtful to the GSA members they're talking about - some of whom have also had their photos posted on these two sites.

The way to fight hate speech is with more speech. Please consider looking at these two sites and explain to these little twits exactly how wrong they are for doing this - in particular, it would be *great* to fill up all their comment boxes with intelligent commentary from grownups explaining just how mean-spirited and stupid they are. If you would also consider posting about this on your own sites or any group blogs you participate in, that would be
wonderful.

Here are the two sites:

http://www.xanga.com/home.aspx?user=GSA
http://www.xanga.com/home.aspx?user=scottrakes

Feel free to forward this email to folks you think might be interested (but be reasonable about it - I don't want this to turn into one of those never-ending forwards!).

Thank you for your help.

posted by Cyn Comments [] 10:28 PM

 

I just have to say, that This American Life is the best thing on public radio, hands down.

posted by Christopher Comments [] 2:28 PM

Sunday, February 09, 2003

 

i am at work and a large man just walked past and he said only "restroom" and then made a hand gesture like bull horns and a growling noise. i found incredibly disturbing.

posted by Wendolyn Comments [] 6:16 PM

Friday, February 07, 2003

 

Chris, I think Thrillzilla should do a cover of In the Navy.

Also, you should send us pictures of you in your sailor suit.

posted by Cyn Comments [] 3:40 PM

 

Everybody, take note of the time of this posting. No, the clock is not off-- I am awake here in the Review office (which does NOT smell so nice) at 6 in the fucking morning. Oh no! I've been spotted doing something other than layout. Gotta go!

posted by Julie Comments [] 6:01 AM

Thursday, February 06, 2003

 

I got to interview Ben for my Review article on the Obertones competing at a competition last weekend. Here is what he said about the other groups at the competition:

"There are girls groups who wear pink, tight, sparkly, cleavage-inducing shirts. And they bounce around a lot."

If I had my way, this would be the quote of the week.

posted by Julie Comments [] 4:06 PM

 

Now that my show doesn't suck so much it seems like a good time to encourage people to check it out. It is called The Curse of the Drinking Class & is on Wednesday mornings 8-10. The little description on the schedule thingy says "punk, indie" but I'm thinking of asking them to change it to "punk, garage, r&r" b/c it will sound cooler that way. You can listen to the webcast here. C'mon guys it'll rule!!

posted by Emily Comments [] 10:56 AM

Wednesday, February 05, 2003

 

For those of you who don't know, I joined the US Navy. I couldn't get back into school for financial reasons, so I enlisted in the Navys Nuclear Power program. Everything is cool, I'm excited. Don't worry about me.

posted by Christopher Comments [] 9:05 PM

 

How much time have I spent play Dress your Gay Dog today? I would rather not say.

(link via East/West)

posted by Cyn Comments [] 5:16 PM

 

Hot Lithuanian Guy I've Been Talking to Online: Would you cut me if I asked you to?
Me: (long pause) Possibly. Where?
HLGIBTO: Maybe my arm or something. That would turn me on. Would you let me make out with you while I was bleeding?

I have two thoughts on this. Wow, he's a keeper, and Crash anyone?

posted by Phil Comments [] 2:08 AM

Monday, February 03, 2003

 

The following conversation took place between myself and the boy I'm fucking:

me: Oh I remember what I was going to do this afternoon-- paint my toenails
him: I could paint them for you
me: not unless you are a trained professional
him: you'd pay people to paint your toenails?
me: pedicures are one of the best things to happen to feet.
him: would you give me a pedicure?
me: sorry, I don't know you that well.

posted by Julie Comments [] 10:50 AM