Emily. Shock and Awe.

Phil. Just Like In the Movies.

Wendy. Ski Bum and Adventuress.

Rachel. Dancing Queen.

Julie. The Littlest Elf.

Chris. There Ain't No Party Like a Marching Band Party.

Cyn. Just a Pink Haired Girl.

 

official best day of work ever: we played monopoly for 4 hours.

posted by Wendolyn Comments [] 9:12 PM

Sunday, May 30, 2004

 

i feel compelled to share gangrenous foot stories with you... please forgive me.
the foot was doing pretty good until i decided to go kayaking. not only did i drop the kayak on my injured foot, but later in the day, i moved a bed into my room (yeah for not having to sleep on the floor) and dropped the corner of the box spring on my foot. the foot became swollen and angry. when i couldn't wiggle my toes without it hurting, i went to the hospital. an emergency room visit late saturday night on a holiday weekend is not first on my list of fun things to do. the doctor lady appeared to be extremely unhappy with the fact that i'd decided to seek medical treatment during her shift. i think i may have agitated her further by saying "my foot feels like a big swollen bug that is going to pop, can you give me antibiotics?" when you ask for antibiotics, they ALWAYS refuse to give them to you. mostly the evil bitch doctor just took x rays and washed out my foot (there was lots of sand stuck in the wound) and gave me scornful looks. conversation which took place:
doctor- this appears to be sand.
-sand, really. oww, that hurts.
doc-(with extreme scorn) have you been at the beach?
-no. kayaking. in the river.
doc-you got sand stuck in your cut in the river?
-apparently (duh, sand, river, water)
doc-you should NOT BE KAYAKING. you should stay completely off your feet.
-sorry. well, it felt fine at the time, so it seemed OK.
doc-also you should not wear shoes that rub on the exposed wound.
-so i should go barefoot? (yeah! barefoot!)
doc-no. you need to go home and elevate your foot for the next few days. no walking, running, kayaking, going to the beach or whatever else you do (not a chance in hell).
so at the end, bitch doctor drew dots with a black sharpie around where she thought the infection was and told me to go home, do nothing, and come back only if it looked like the infection had spread beyond the dots. thus, i am at work barefoot (yeah!), with my foot up on the desk (this constitutes elevation while simultaneously irritating my boss!) and i continue to monitor my dots. maybe if i get bored later, i will connect them!

posted by Wendolyn Comments [] 5:30 PM

 

Hey Britophiles -

Does anyone know:

1. Good places to buy cheap flights to London?

2. Good cheap places to stay in London?

posted by Cyn Comments [] 12:57 PM

Thursday, May 27, 2004

 

I take one of my last tests of A-school tomorrow. I take my comp review test on Tuesday. It covers everything I've learned in the past 14 weeks, so we'll be studying all weekend, including Memorial Day. It's amazing to think about how much I've learned while here. I can sort of feel it all sloshing around in my head. I see piping and valves out in town, and the name, construction, and maintenance immediately pop into my head. I then beat back the thoughts with alcohol.

I graduate next Friday. Then, 6 weeks of standing watch and drinking. And then home! Crazy adventures to come, I swear.

posted by Christopher Comments [] 9:38 PM

 

Phase I of my move happened yesterday. After my radio show ended at 2, I rushed to the grocery store to pick up some bagels, spreadable cheese, & crudite -- I had invited some people over for a "moving party" & planned to bribe them to help with food & beer. My friend Garth arrived first, around 3:30. The process involved loading up the truck with a sofa, a bookcase, a big chair & about 10 boxes of books, driving it down Route 1 into D.C., carrying them into their new home, driving back, taking apart my IKEA bookshelf & futon frame, putting those things in the truck along with another bookshelf & some sundry boxes, driving down & carrying again, driving back, driving up to aunt Muffy's house to return her pickup truck, & then driving home again in my car. By this time it was about 9 hours later & a total of 8 people had helped at various points in time (Muffy helped by lending me the truck). I had moved so much furniture & drank so much beer (some of it straight out of the jug -- yes, there's a place here where you can buy beer by the jug) that I was about as tired when I got home as I have ever been. I was still tired when I got up this morning. I am kind of impressed with myself that I made the moving party happen, though.

Wendy -- I get the impression that some people enjoy hearing the cicadas, but I don't really understand why. It's not really a cute bug noise like with crickets or something. A single cicada sounds like somebody starting up a motorcycle, & when there is a group of them they produce an ominous hum sort of like a nuclear power plant.

posted by Emily Comments [] 6:19 PM

Tuesday, May 25, 2004

 

there are 2 cats at my new house, which makes me very happy and helps with the not being too sad about my cat dissapearing. their names are rose and whitney. i prefer to believe that they are named after mountains rather than being white trash kitties, but you never know. regardless, they're cute, and they're littermates, although one is a short-haired tortoise shell and the other is long-haired and grey. my housemate, mary beth, and i were discussing this last night-- apparently cats can have multiple fathers in the same litter of kittens. thus, they're really only half sisters and look nothing alike. cats are sluts. i woundn't have thought this, but they are. the conversation led me to have the craziest dream: i had kittens except they had people heads and each looked like i different guy i'd been dating. they had little tails and meowed, it was very cute but also extremely disturbing.

posted by Wendolyn Comments [] 12:28 PM

Monday, May 24, 2004

 

It occurred to me this might be a good time to suggest people listen to my radio show, which you can do via webcast. It's on Wednesdays from noon to 2 this summer, & this fall I probably won't be doing one. You can also download last week's show if you do it by like tonight.

Until this evening, it was outrageously hot & humid here; a lady on the TV weather described it as "like chicken soup, & the cicadas are the chicken." You can tell I am getting old because I find the witticisms on the TV weather incisive. The cicadas, for those who live in non-cicada-having areas, are big fuckers, & they have crazy red eyes. They're really bad flyers so they spend a lot of time just standing or walking around on the ground. When they do fly, they seem to go in a straight line, & bonk into anything in their path. If you lived here you would hear the hum of their enigmatic love songs as they sit in the trees. If you ran a business here, you would make a sign or advertisement facetiously offering "free cicada with purchase."

I am moving this week. I am going to borrow Muffy's pickup truck to drive the heavy items down there, & hopefully will get all my possessions out of here by the end of the month. I will give you all new address & phone info soon. Andy just left. It is a beautiful summer night. I feel all crazy, much like I did that one time in October. Wish you all were here.

posted by Emily Comments [] 9:01 PM

 

so crazy drunken single wendy is all hungover at work now. i had quite the weekend. friday i went to a jazz festival with my friend christen and our mutual friend mr jungle juice. the music was excellent and there were many opportunities to frighten the old people. we met some adorable hungarians who had a band called the hot jazz band, then invited them over to get stoned and eat frozen pizza. unfortunatly there was no frozen pizza when we got home, but we did get very high and take lots of shots of southern comfort, then had a big wrestling match, which, judging from some strange bruises, i lost. when i went outside, a bear had had stuck its head into my car window and was attempting to eat some reeses pieces out of the front seat. yes, a bear. i attempted to chase it and fell down. we ate the reeses pieces anyway.
saturday, i went rafting for about the 30th time this week and it was fabulous as always. i had to jump into the river at one point and because the damn river is full of fucking trash, ended up cutting my foot really bad on some metal. my foot bled all day as we forgot to bring a first aid kit... we are really the best river guides in the business! i spent that night at jody's house watching futurama and having the following conversation:
-your foot is totally sick. can you even move your toe?
-a little
-that's not cool
-yeah, good thing i have 2 feet! ok. owww. fuck. i should go to the hospital. but i think i'm too drunk to go to the hospital. can you drive?
-no. did you get all those bruises rafting, too?
-no, i got beat up by hungarians
-why?
-i promised them pizza but didn't have any.
so, sunday was even better, as more people decided to give me shit about the gangrenous foot. man, when you have a funky nasty injury, everyone suddenly has an opinion. they love to ask if you've put antibiotics on it, and i can't resist saying, "no i didn't think of that, but great idea, maybe i'll do that tomorrow!" my friend april was in a fashion show to raise money for arts for schools sunday night. there were several great things about this fashion show: the clothes were from local stores and very cool, it was held in a bar and utilized the bar itself as the catwalk, the bar had been outfitted with a pole for dancing purposes, beer was $1. people went nuts, stripping ensued, some very incriminating photos were taken. we left because the bar was closing and wound up at april and jody's house amid massive drunken craziness. jody and i were having sex and suddenly there was lots of noise and april and jack came running into the room carrying a canoe paddle and screaming, jumped on the bed on top of us, and april yelled "you guys are having sex!" so we got up and chased them around the house completely naked, everyone screaming, until someone tripped over something, then we stopped and were like "what the fuck. how completely high are we?" anyway. that's how i've been spending my single time. i sure hope my liver makes it.

posted by Wendolyn Comments [] 11:56 AM

Sunday, May 23, 2004

 

So yesterday I went to a Makeout Party hosted by the "art nerd porn collective." Of course, there were like, six Oberlin people there.

I found out that "skeet skeet" means to come on someone's face in hiphop parlance.

I also found out that this girl I know through my friend Carl has slept with Jack Murnigan! Unfortunately, she said that he is boring.

There was less making out than would have been ideal, but still some making out, which is much better than no making out.

posted by Cyn Comments [] 3:46 PM

Wednesday, May 19, 2004

 

more plot twists than you can shake a stick at:
just wanted to make you aware of the insane changes in my current lifestyle and also all the dirty nasty amazing green eyed kayaker sex. at some point last week chris and i had the big ol falling out and the conversation and the breakup. i decided i did not want to grow up. growing up is bad. i am filled with guilt and relief. i am, how do you say it, disengaged??? the night of the big ol fight, my cat dissapeared. the cat has not come back. i cried more over the cat than the relationship, but that's perfectly understandable. i managed to not buy the new car that i'd just bought and did some fancy ass kissing at wells fargo to get out of my loan. i spent several days camping and relishing my homelessness. there were some good slumber parties. breaking up is the best way to get quality time with your friends. we watched cheesy ski movies and drank heavily-- i highly recommend it! there is a certain kayaker with beautiful green eyes and we had sex everywhere all of the time. then, i stumbled upon a place to live, which is nicer than any house i've ever lived in or probably ever hope to live in. i move in on friday... it's all so fantastic and terrible all at the same time. pretty great, i'm excited.

posted by Wendolyn Comments [] 8:27 PM

 

1. Sorry about the blog being down recently - it is my fault, as I neglected to pay the bills for it.

2. Here is an excerpt from an Oberlin Alumni Club of LA newsletter I recently received:

---------------------------------------
From Nehara Kaley, OC 94

A different kind of wedding

SAVE THE DATE! YOU ARE INVITED TO

THE WEDDING JOURNEY: Vows In Midair
High Impact Dance And Aerial Theatre Performance
A Dance Theatre Reality Event!

Real life creates art in this wedding journey on June 19th, 2004 at 7pm at
the historic Wilshire Ebell Theatre in Los Angeles, CA. Nehara Kalev and
C. Derrick Jones invite you to experience the explosive visual and
emotional arc of their actual wedding. Through dance, theater, music,
and word, witness them taking the leap. Literally.

Obie award winning Rachel Rosenthal, renowned performance artist, and also
an ordained minister, will be featured in this live show marrying the
couple.

Derrick and Nehara met in 1998 as graduate students at UCLA. Now former
members of Diavolo Dance Theatre, their multifaceted collaboration is
highly physical, theatrical and acrobatic, expressing their diverse
artistic influences.

Nehara is a dancer and choreographer whose name is a Hebrew word for the
light that shines from your face when you are happy. Derrick is an
African-American theatrical performer and improviser from a family of
artists and civil rights activists. The convergence of their distinct
cultural and artistic backgrounds is deftly illustrated in this athletic
duo. Step aboard this intense metaphorical ride as they reveal the
dynamics of their unique partnership.

Derrick and Nehara's wedding will be a true intersection of life and art.
They look forward to their union and hope it will inspire others to leap
with abandon.

--------------------------------------------

I feel that people who graduated from normal colleges do not get invited to performance art weddings in their alumni newsletters.

3. Did you all know that Peter Goldsmith died? I'm kind of sad for him and his little bicycle.

posted by Cyn Comments [] 12:18 PM

Tuesday, May 18, 2004

 

My brother is joining the Navy. He signed up yesterday, and ships out on June 2nd. I'm excited for him, but a little worried. He's going to be a Seebee, and after school will probably be sent to Iraq. Seebee's are basically the people who follow the Marines and build what the Marines need (bridges, barracks, etc.). So, he could feasibly see combat. A necessary job, but still worried. It's one thing to think about my own death, another thing to think about his.

posted by Christopher Comments [] 11:26 PM

Friday, May 14, 2004

 

i have not posted in a while. bad wendy!
i just finished two weeks of whitewater rafting guide school, and i will be working part time as a guide this summer. guide school has easily been my best educational experience thus far. raft all day, drink all night, pass out in your tent, repeat until tanned. i have had many crazy adventures, possibly broken my nose, swallowed lots of riverwater, and done some very excellent table dancing. the moral of the story is that fresh air, alcoholism, and camping are the perfect combination-- it's going to be a great summer.

posted by Wendolyn Comments [] 5:59 PM

 

All Kinds of Shit is Going On

& I will compile it all into a "hot or not" list. P.S. Blogger is weird now.

Not
-- Apartment hunting. As those of you on Friendster may know, I am moving out of here to live in the big city. Toward that end, I have been looking at rooms in group houses. Going into other people's homes is a great opportunity to observe the vast panorama of life; unfortunately, in the case of Washington, D.C., it is a vast panorama of hippies & Republicans.
-- Britney Spears. She looks TERRIBLE now. Her face is red & puffy as can be. Last week she was photographed wearing a trucker hat, a button shirt tied below the boobs, & that type of cutoff shorts that are cut so short the pockets dangle down below the level of the shorts. I was like, what are you, in 8th grade? I am going to make the controversial claim that she is one of the ugliest people ever to be considered attractive by a mass audience.
-- Governor Bob Erlich. He was quoted a couple of days ago as saying that multiculturalism is "crap" & that everyone should abide by our American culture, values, & language. There's no such language as "American"! So, yes, the governor of Maryland is a Nazi.

Hot
-- Grading final papers. They don't need to get them back, so I don't have to write anything; I just dictate a few comments into a tape recorder.
-- Columbia Heights. This is the part of D.C. I am moving to. (I may actually have found a place.) Conversation I had with Andy about it:

Emily: Well, I'm thinking of moving to Columbia Heights.
Andy: {Simultaneously watching Woodstock with his friend Jeff} Oh. That's where Jesus died.
Emily: What, Columbia Heights?
Andy: Yeah. Columbia Heights is where the real Jesus died.

-- Troy. I am so psyched about seeing this.

posted by Emily Comments [] 4:50 PM

Thursday, May 06, 2004

 

So not only am I a science dork, but now I find Navy humor funny. Yesterday we were in class. The instructor proceeded to tell sea stories about life on a carrier, and malfunctions of weapons systems. The end of this included the words "So, a destroyer is a sacrificial anode for a carrier." At which point the entire class laughs.

posted by Christopher Comments [] 9:51 PM

Monday, May 03, 2004

 

I just got back from Columbus, where I have been visiting Andy this weekend. (For those who don't know, he is living there with his friend Jeff for the unlikely sum of $200 a month in rent.) I drove up there listening to The Sound & the Fury on tape, & all seemed well, but in fact it was not. This was due to the fact that the Pennsylvania Turnpike starts out as 70 but changes into 80 somewhere in Pennsylvania. The fact I was somehow unaware of was that I was supposed to stay on 70 rather than staying on the Turnpike, so I ended up in Cleveland, then was all confused & had to spend 2 hours driving down to Columbus. Basically, I had an incredible journey, like in that movie where 2 dogs & a cat have to go on an incredible journey to find their owners. It is Andy's birthday on the 6th, which we observed by me giving him presents & baking him a cake. I had the hell of a time with the cake -- there was a shortage of confectioner's sugar &, more damagingly,, their oven is broken. I turned out tasty anyway.

Emily: This cake is a triumph. If it had just gone normally & there hadn't been any problems, it wouldn't have been such a triumph. It's like a rich guy getting into a good college. Everyone expects it.
Andy: Or an Irishman getting thrown out of a bar.
Emily: Or a black guy getting an unfair trial.

As I expected, The Sound & the Fury did not have a happy ending. I haven't been away from my apartment in such a long time for a while. It smells nice here.

posted by Emily Comments [] 12:07 AM